Best Ballers According to Balls

After Kobe Bryant winning his 4^th NBA ring, and the recent news of O’Neal moving once again to team up with King James, the question remains where do these NBA legends rank in NBA history? Of course this is meant for debate so feel free to share your comments, but here are the Best Ballers according to Balls:

10. Oscar Robertson

The 12 time All-Star surely makes the list. He is the only player in NBA history to average a triple double for the course of an entire NBA season. This stat is absurd; the equivalent would be winning the Triple Crown in either baseball or horse racing, or dating the three hottest Jessica’s {Simpson, Alba, and Biel} all in the same year. A Rookie of the Year Award, MVP, and NBA Championship also help cement his greatness in NBA history.

9. Tim Duncan

He could be the most boring player to watch of all time, yet the Big Fundamental is the greatest power forward to ever play the game. Duncan is a 4 time NBA Champion, 3 time NBA Finals MVP, and 2 time NBA MVP. He also won Rookie of the Year and is an 11 time All-Star with that number surely to increase. The new addition of Richard Jefferson can also help Duncan and the Spurs compete for their fifth championship in the last 10 years.

8. Shaquille O’Neal

He has been referred to as the most dominant player to ever play the game. He has more nicknames than the amount of husbands Elizabeth Taylor had, which includes The Diesel, The Big Aristotle, Superman, The Big Cactus, The Big Shaqtus {and I’m sure I’m missing some but you get the idea.} More than just a great basketball player, he became a media icon. Even non-sport fans know who Shaq is. He raps {His YouTube video asking Kobe how his ass tastes}, movies {remember Kazaam} and was even given an honorary U.S. Deputy Marshal Title. Besides his popular off the court antics, he is a superstar on the court as well. He has 4 NBA rings to go along with 3 Finals Most Valuable Player Awards. He has won the Regular Season MVP Award in 2000, Rookie of the Year Award, and 3 All-Star MVP Awards to go along with his 15 All-Star appearances.

7. Kobe Bryant

He is not Michael Jordan, but he is the second best shooting guard, at least in my book after winning it all this past season. Boy did the Hornets look dumb {with Jerry West looking like a genius} for trading the 13^th pick Bryant to the Lakers on draft day for Vlade Divac. Kobe Bryant’s resume consists of 4 Championships, 1 Finals and Regular Season MVP trophy, and 11 All-Star appearances and counting. His greatest individual accomplishment had to be scoring 81 points in a game against the Raptors. Maybe less awards then the previous two players mentioned, but the Black Mamba has the better chance out of the two to complete his entire hand with NBA rings. With also the greatest potential to raise his stock in the upcoming years, Kobe Bryant has certainly turned his NBA career around after avoiding a sexual assault allegation.

6. Larry Bird

Larry Legend is the lone white player to make the list and the greatest small forward in NBA history. He is only one of three players to win the NBA MVP for three consecutive years from 1984-1986. Bird is a 3 time NBA Champion with 2 Finals MVP awards. The rivalry between his Celtics and Magic’s Lakers captivated the league throughout the entire 1980’s. He was a 12 time All-Star and Rookie of the Year winner who epitomized the true meaning of Celtic Pride.

5. Wilt Chamberlain

Can you say Beast? He scored 100 points in a game against the Knicks and these were not today’s Knicks under D’antoni who give away points like Michael Jackson gave away candy to eight year olds.{R.I.P.} In fact one season he averaged 44.8 points per game to go along with 24.3 rebounds. He won 4 MVP Awards, 2 NBA Championships and 1 Finals MVP {he would have won a second Finals MVP for the 67’championship however this award was not created until 1969} A 13 time NBA All-Star, Rookie of the Year Award in 1960, and most Total Rebounds in league history were also a part of the many accomplishments obtained by the former Harlem Globetrotter.

4. Bill Russell

As the old adage goes, “Winning isn’t everything; it is the only thing.” That pretty much sums up the career of the greatest player to ever wear the green and white. Winning 11 titles in his 13 seasons of playing is absolutely remarkable. The best defensive player the NBA has ever seen was also a 5 time recipient of the NBA’s Most Valuable Player trophy. He served as player-coach winning three titles during that span. Russell was apart of 12 All-Star teams. When you think of the 60’s you may think of the Beatles, but in the Basketball world, Russell and his Celtics dominated winning the title every year in the 60’s except in 67’.

3. Kareem Abdul Jabbar

Some players’ statistics do not tell the whole story; nevertheless, with Lew Alcindor they indeed do. He has the most points in league history with 38,387. His list of accomplishments is as long as Michael Jackson’s list of play dates.{Last time, honestly} He is a 6 time NBA Champion and 6 time MVP. Winning 2 Finals MVP awards and Rookie of the Year Award are a few of his many highlights during his 20 year playing career. He made the All-Star roster a record 19 times. Probably the coolest recognition of his overall talent was that he created his own shot known as the “Sky Hook.”

2. Magic Johnson

The greatest Point Guard in NBA History who led the “Show Time” Lakers under Pat Riley in the 80’s to 5 championships. He won 3 Regular Season and 3 Finals MVP Awards while winning the Finals MVP in just his rookie season. Magic, a 12 time All-Star, had the versatility to play all positions of guard, forward and center. The flare that Johnson played with on the court was matched by his personality and charisma off the court even as he continues to battle against HIV to this day.

1. Michael Jordan

Do I really need to explain myself with this one? Besides his many accomplishments which include 6 NBA Championships, 6 NBA Finals MVP Awards, 5 NBA MVP Awards, 14 All-Star appearances, and Rookie of the Year Award, he transcended basketball from sport to entertainment. He was a marketing machine with corporate sponsorships making the NBA popular for fans all across the world. Air Jordan was so admirable even Larry Bird in the famous Gatorade commercial even wished he could be “Like Mike.”One of if not the most famous athletes of all time who was the epitome of clutch, has to be at the top of any list when it comes to basketball and greatness.

Stan the Man

Shaq called him the “Master of Panic”. Dwight called him out after a Game 5 loss to the Celtics. Heck even the Magic’s backup center, Marcin Gortat, had the nerve to rip his own head coach. The media makes Van Gundy out to look like Joe Biden, the target of all jokes who doesn’t know when to keep his mouth shut. Yet with all of the criticism he has received by outsiders and within his own locker room, Stan Van Gundy has the chance to win the Orlando Magic its first ever NBA Championship. He must be doing something right.

Van Gundy started out his career by learning from one of the best in the business. He was an assistant and the heir apparent to Pat Riley within the Miami Heat Organization. After taking over for Riley he turned the Heat into a playoff team; however, Riley surely wanted to come back to coach once he was able to acquire Shaquille O’Neal from the Lakers. Riley basically told Van Gundy to “Stan” down or else he would be fired. Van Gundy then announced he was taking a leave of absence to spend more time with family which sounded as believable as OJ Simpson announcing he was going to search for the real killer. He finally found the job he wanted in Orlando only to be passed on by Billy Donovan, the Florida Gators coach who led the program to back to back championships. It was only after Donovan decided to go back to school {to prove to dad that I’m not a fool} that Van Gundy got offered the job. And now in only his second year as the Magic head coach, they are Eastern Conference Champions.

Part of being a great head coach is the legacy you leave behind. Hiring Patrick Ewing as an assistant coach after he previously worked for the Houston Rockets, proved to be valuable. After elevating the careers of both Yao Ming and Dwight Howard, Patrick Ewing will now have the opportunity to become a legitimate candidate for a head coaching position. Dwight Howard became the unquestioned, most dominant center in the NBA. This season, Howard won Defensive player of the year after leading the league in rebounds and blocks. He finished second only to David Lee with 63 double-doubles, and in the two years Ewing coached him he averaged 20 points per game.

Van Gundy’s team is playing unconventional basketball. Dwight Howard is the defensive guru while not necessarily their main offensive weapon in the closing minutes of a game. They rely mostly on the one NBA rule you are never supposed to follow. {They live and die on the three point shot} They have the most versatile front court in the NBA headlined by Howard. Rashard Lewis at 6’10 is an extremely tough cover for any opposing forward who can make threes while also having the quickness to drive to the basket. Hedo Turkoglu also at 6’10 from Turkey has the ability to put the ball on the floor and even plays some point forward during crunch time. I forgot to mention that for the second half of the season, Van Gundy’s team has been missing their all star point guard Jameer Nelson. There are not many teams that can survive a playoff run without having one of its all stars playing.

Sure it is easy to make fun of the guy who looks like porn star Ron Jeremy, but let’s give credit where credit is due. Stan Van Gundy is only one of three current NBA coaches not in their first year of coaching who has made the playoffs in every season. {Mike Brown and Phil Jackson are the other two}He was a finalist for Coach of the Year but the award was given to Mike Brown instead, who was badly outcoached by Van Gundy during their series. Of course for Van Gundy’s story to have a fairytale ending, he needs to defeat the Lakers for the NBA championship. Getting a ring before his brother Jeff Van Gundy, who will be at courtside announcing all the games for ABC, would just be icing on the cake.